They finally did it: they made extra-healthy donuts filled with protein that can give you energy for the gym, and they’re calling them ‘Go-Nuts’.

Boom. What a world in which we live. From here, it’s just a hop, skip and a jump until we have flying cars and a Mars colony. Still, despite the total cynic in me, I can’t help but be impressed by the concept. People love the gym, people love health food, people love donuts. Combine all three into one mega product and give it a catchy title and I’m sold, along with the entire Lizard’s Lair panel.

At least it’s not that one guy who promised that renovations would never again be a significant investment. What was it again? Bathroom design via holograms, or…wallpaper, or something? I think we’ve had both. I don’t know; I watch every episode of Lizard’s Lair so I can fill up my daily cringe quota, and they tend to blue together after a while.

These people are living TOO much in the future, if you ask me. Renovations are always going to be a pain and are going to take a while, because they involve changing a physical space. No use just slapping a veneer over the top; people won’t go for it, because…it’s not real? People like real stuff. Like…okay, it’s like wearing a dress that looks the same as a Gucci, but isn’t. Even if the illusion is there, people still buy Gucci. It’s just a ‘real’ brand.

I don’t hold out any hope for dramatic bathroom renovations and kitchen transformations, because I don’t hold out hope for anything that massive. People around here might think they’re going to find treasure at the bottom of the Melbourne bay or establish a Kingdom on the Moon, but…things don’t change that fast. Fact. If you want the best kitchen designers in Melbourne to come up with a fancy kitchen, be prepared to pay a bit of money and not use the kitchen for a little while. Because everything is being ripped up and replaced. That’s what renovation is.