Wait, hang on. Is that squash? Which is the one where they’re hitting the ball against the wall? Definitely squash, okay, great. Thank you, image search! I wouldn’t want to go onto the Week of Our Lives forums and start discussing totally the wrong sport, and have every laugh at me.
Some MAJOR shakeups in today’s episode, as the famous cricket player Dane Flotsam came to live in the old manor on the outskirts of Realsville. This was already the talk of the town BEFORE Dane saw to it personally that the local cricket oval was furnished with the best quality cricket nets money could buy, as well as a ton of sports equipment. And all this before anyone had even seen him!
Naturally, Felicia wanted to go and thank Dane in person, since all of her eight sons play cricket and her campaign to have new nets installed has been a running theme- or perhaps a running gag- for about three years now. So she goes over to the manor, but gets lost because that’s SO like her, and she finds herself accidentally driving in the back entrance. That also happens to be where the manor cricket grounds are, now refurbished and looking great, but upon parking and trying to find Dane, Felicia discovers an awful truth: it’s NOT the real Dane Flotsam! This is an imposter, wearing a latex mask, confirmed by the fact that he’s hitting cricket balls into the net in a desperate attempt to improve his abysmal game.
Felician rounds up the townsfolk, they break down the gates and confront the fake Dane, who breaks down and confesses that he’s just a rich nobody who desperately wanted to be known for his cricket skills, despite not having any. He’s been making anonymous donations to cricket grounds for years, allowing them to fit out with the greatest cricket nets- or possibly indoor cricket nets– that money could buy. But it wasn’t enough. He wanted to be adored not for his money, but for his skill, so he took the identity of a famous cricketer and tried to win the hearts of the townsfolk.
The forums are ablaze with arguments over whether he should be forgiven. Personally, I think by replacing the old, worn cricket nets for children to have a shot at his dream, I’d forgive him. But it’s a true fandom war right now. Just…insults everywhere. I hope the mods step in soon.